saudade (ongoing)

A theme that is very personal to me that I still have not fully started discovering is: self-identity and nostalgia. Having moved country at a very young age, and ever since I have struggled with my identity. For years, I had repressed these feelings. With time, though, I began to experience intense nostalgia for the way my first "home" used to feel. In the life I am currently leading, in a new nation surrounded by so many other cultures, I started paying attention to what makes me feel nostalgic. I began observing my environment and recording these sensations. Whether it was a drink of water that made me think of "home," a swamp, or the grandmother's ring my cat was playing with. Since then, I've been compelled by my curiosity to continue searching for this feeling, wherever I go I attempt to capture this melancholy sense of home. The main objective of this project is to determine whether it's possible for immigrants to establish connections with their new environment, including their surroundings and the surrounding nature, and to find a sense of identity and belonging. I have been photographing primarily on medium format analogue camera, to help me depict the details of my emotions and memories. I believe that recording it in black and white gives the images a surreal, dream-like appearance. Additionally, I frequently utilise mirrors in my practice because they can signify many layers of our soul and unconscious mind. Through my melancholy gaze, this project captures reality and curiosity.